Straight men who bottom
Ever wanted to know the secrets to becoming a power bottom? Want to know how to stare after the bottoms in your life? Curious to give bottoming a strive but not sure how to begin?
We can aide you become a finer bottom! Here are some quick bottoming tips and tricks from ACON’s peer-workshop Booty Basics.
1. Lube
The arse does not produce its own lubrication.
This means that lube is really, really important for any anal play. First, to interrupt damage to the internal lining of your arse. Second, to make bottoming (and topping!) more pleasurable. And third, to support protect it from infections.
Remember to use water or silicon-based lubes, as oil-based lubes can damage condoms.
2. You
The second principle is YOU. This is the one that covers off all the mental and emotional aspects such as making sure you touch safe, making sure there is consent, that you feel comfortable, that you know your own bottoming limits and desires.
Remember, sex is best for everyone if all the people involved are motivated by trying to maximise everyone’s pleasure safely. You can’t be a good partner and you can’t trial pleasure for yourself if you’re stressed or uncomfortable (bottom or not!).
3. R In a sexual context, bottoming is the act of taking a dick (or a dick-shaped object) in your ass. When it comes to gay and bi men, a lot of people seem considerate of obsessed with functional out who’s a top/giver and who’s a bottom/receiver, but in reality many MSM (men who hold sex with men) act both and some perform neither. In 2021, it’s painfully heteronormative to presume that sexual intercourse has to involve a hole being filled by something cock-shaped.
On one level, bottoming is really no giant deal – if you like riding dick, depart ahead and ride it. But on another, butt-fucking is still cloaked in myth and stigma. “There’s an association that those who bottom are feminine and those who foremost are masculine,” says Ian Howley, CEO of the health and wellbeing aid LGBT HERO. “And we all know where that stigma comes from: Hello, toxic masculinity.”
Happily, Howley says this reductive presumption is finally dying out as we all become more open-minded. “You now view lots of ‘masculine’ men who enjoy bottoming, including straight men who finally found out just how much pleasure they can get from their arse,” he says. Some even like to define themselves as a “p
Theyexist.
Many gay men might reject to believe it. Many straight women might resist to even think about it. But they exist: straight men (self-identified males who are sexually attracted to females) who greatly enjoy bottoming (being the receptive partner during anal intercourse).
My friend Matt could not find an acceptable explanation for all the moaning and groaning coming from his roommate Lisa's bedroom. The ecstatic voice of Lisa's boyfriend echoed in the apartment for interminable hours. Matt, who always had a very healthy gay sex being, was somewhat intrigued by what sounded like glorious enjoyment. There was something familiar in Lisa's partner vocal epiphany of pleasure, in its rhythm, in its hesitations. Matt and Lisa were good friends, so when curiosity took over, he directly inquired about the details of her sexual practices. Lisa explained that her lover liked to have anal sex (although this was not exactly her decision of words). More precisely, he liked -- loved even -- for Lisa to wear a strap-on dildo and penetrate him.
Anal sex is the unused oral sex, the last sexual anathema to be challenged, confronted, and decomposed. It is increasingly more preva
Why do some straight men have sex with other men?
According to nationally-representative surveys in the United States, hundreds of thousands of straight-identified men have had sex with other men.
In the new book Still Straight: Sexual Flexibility among White Men in Rural America released today, UBC sociologist Dr. Tony Silva argues that these men – many of whom enjoy hunting, fishing and shooting guns – are not closeted, bisexual or just experimenting.
After interviewing 60 of these men over three years, Dr. Silva found that they relish a range of relationships with other men, from hookups to sexual friendships to secretive loving partnerships, all while strongly recognizing with straight culture.
We spoke with Dr. Silva about his book.
Why do straight-identified men have sex with other men?
The majority of the men I interviewed reported that they are primarily attracted to women, not men. Most of these men are also married to women and prefer to have sex with women. They explained that although they loved their wives, their marital sex lives were not as active as they wanted. Sex with men allowed them to hold more sex. They don’t consider sex with men cheating and s
.
In a sexual context, bottoming is the act of taking a dick (or a dick-shaped object) in your ass. When it comes to gay and bi men, a lot of people seem considerate of obsessed with functional out who’s a top/giver and who’s a bottom/receiver, but in reality many MSM (men who hold sex with men) act both and some perform neither. In 2021, it’s painfully heteronormative to presume that sexual intercourse has to involve a hole being filled by something cock-shaped.
On one level, bottoming is really no giant deal – if you like riding dick, depart ahead and ride it. But on another, butt-fucking is still cloaked in myth and stigma. “There’s an association that those who bottom are feminine and those who foremost are masculine,” says Ian Howley, CEO of the health and wellbeing aid LGBT HERO. “And we all know where that stigma comes from: Hello, toxic masculinity.”
Happily, Howley says this reductive presumption is finally dying out as we all become more open-minded. “You now view lots of ‘masculine’ men who enjoy bottoming, including straight men who finally found out just how much pleasure they can get from their arse,” he says. Some even like to define themselves as a “p
Theyexist.
Many gay men might reject to believe it. Many straight women might resist to even think about it. But they exist: straight men (self-identified males who are sexually attracted to females) who greatly enjoy bottoming (being the receptive partner during anal intercourse).
My friend Matt could not find an acceptable explanation for all the moaning and groaning coming from his roommate Lisa's bedroom. The ecstatic voice of Lisa's boyfriend echoed in the apartment for interminable hours. Matt, who always had a very healthy gay sex being, was somewhat intrigued by what sounded like glorious enjoyment. There was something familiar in Lisa's partner vocal epiphany of pleasure, in its rhythm, in its hesitations. Matt and Lisa were good friends, so when curiosity took over, he directly inquired about the details of her sexual practices. Lisa explained that her lover liked to have anal sex (although this was not exactly her decision of words). More precisely, he liked -- loved even -- for Lisa to wear a strap-on dildo and penetrate him.
Anal sex is the unused oral sex, the last sexual anathema to be challenged, confronted, and decomposed. It is increasingly more preva
Why do some straight men have sex with other men?
According to nationally-representative surveys in the United States, hundreds of thousands of straight-identified men have had sex with other men.
In the new book Still Straight: Sexual Flexibility among White Men in Rural America released today, UBC sociologist Dr. Tony Silva argues that these men – many of whom enjoy hunting, fishing and shooting guns – are not closeted, bisexual or just experimenting.
After interviewing 60 of these men over three years, Dr. Silva found that they relish a range of relationships with other men, from hookups to sexual friendships to secretive loving partnerships, all while strongly recognizing with straight culture.
We spoke with Dr. Silva about his book.
Why do straight-identified men have sex with other men?
The majority of the men I interviewed reported that they are primarily attracted to women, not men. Most of these men are also married to women and prefer to have sex with women. They explained that although they loved their wives, their marital sex lives were not as active as they wanted. Sex with men allowed them to hold more sex. They don’t consider sex with men cheating and s
.